It’s the city that never sleeps. From its vibrant culture and city lights to the hustle and flow mentality of every soul, New York might just be the next move.  I know I have always wanted to move out from my home state (Lowell, Massachusetts) and move to a place where I could finally plant my own roots and lay the foundation of my life. As scary and crazy as it sounds the big apple might be destined for me.

So this whole idea started when I recently went for a weekend to celebrate a friend’s birth day.   Long story short it was LIT. I am talking about from the night life to a day of sightseeing. We ended up renting an Airbnb in Manhattan for the few days we were there and commuted everywhere using subway or Uber.  Over the years, I have been fortunate enough to visit NYC several times but it was only this time round where I got to see NY for its true authentic self and I completely fell in love. They weren’t wrong when they said home is where the heart is. In the past when I visited, I only did the touristy stuff. Visiting Times Square, Brooklyn Bridge, Statue of Liberty and so on and so forth. But it was until I got to experience the culture is when I finally fell in love.

NY is well known for its diversity. It’s literally a melting pot of everybody from different cultures and all walks of all life. One thing for sure, you’re bound to at least meet every race and ethnicity. According to, More than 800 languages are spoken in New York City, making it the most linguistically diverse city in the world. 4 in 10 households speak a language other than English.

It’s crazy because everybody that I have told about the idea of moving to NY has basically looked at me crazy. They get this look on their face of ‘WTF’. The notion of NY being an expensive city and the fast paced doesn’t scare me at all. I mean it does a little bit but it’s in the sense of the fact that I am getting out of my comfort zone. But all in all the idea of proving everybody wrong and challenging myself on a different level of capacity is one of the few things that’s actually attracting me to it.

In this journey, I have made sure to check other parts of NY just in case this whole city thing doesn’t really work out for me. I had the opportunity to visit a good friend who lives in Albany, NY. Albany definitely shocked me. It wasn’t what I expected it to be. Meaning, I was expecting upstate New York vibes and a whole lot of countryside. (I apologize for my ignorance and bad geography skills.) Although being the capital for NY and way much smaller than NYC, it left a good impression on me. A city that’s way more diverse in every aspect than what I am used to still contributed to my love for the state as a whole. Let’s not forget the beauty of its architectural buildings and its rich history of the American people.

When I think of living in the big apple I picture myself like the likes of Janet mock the co-stars of the new show hustle in Brooklyn, Jessica Parker in sex and the city and some of my favorite people that I follow or look up to. From their career paths to the social lifestyle. Low-key, they have made it look easy but I am ready to hustle and grind to make it in this big city. Failure is absolutely not an option.

All in all I am not putting my eggs all in one basket. The whole point of this post is to put the idea out into the universe and let it manifest towards my end goal. Maybe New York will not work out. It might be a different city or town in Massachusetts or even a different country but am so ready to plant my seeds in a different garden. Wherever that maybe, I am ready to spread my wings and soar.

The so called “Dating Life”😕.

The journey to self-discovery has no end! It’s a continuous voyage that one can only learn along the way while being put to the test to what you have already learned. Life has not wasted any moment in putting me through different tests, where I have had to prove that I did learn from my past and can’t afford to make the same mistakes.

As human beings it’s natural to yearn and search for a soulmate whether for friendship or intimacy through a significant other. Personally I have been open to satisfying this urge and in the process, I have come across folks who are on the path to satisfy the same need. In other words I have joined the dating scene and it’s not as easy or fun as I hoped it would be. It’s actually been more exhausting.

I am quite a social person or so I would like to believe but who thought dating in this generation is a whole type of ball game. Being an old-school type of individual (meaning I’ve tried online dating, not into hook ups or friends with benefits), I feel like a different type of breed partaking in the world of dating among my peer group. If you don’t know what I am talking about, monogamous/committed relationships in my generation is quite hard to find. Personally I’ve always been open to dating, so I’ve had my share of online dates as well as “fun” but just recently, is when I became serious about it. Especially now that its summer and its a new chapter of my life, I thought I would give it a shot.

Funny how some people that I’ve met can really test your whole being (insecurities and all). I guess the point of this blog post is that there’s a very thin line to settling for less in order to fulfill the urge of finding a significant other. Whether it’s for intimacy or just friendship. Being always the single one among your friends can get pretty frustrating. Although I do know what I deserve, I would be lying if I said that through this process I’ve allowed to be disrespected to a certain extent where I did question my worthiness. Hence my self-discovery journey was put to the test.

Now that I’ve moved back home, I also thought I would reconnect old friendships as well as extend olive branches to friendships that had died. Being in a new found space doesn’t mean the other party is in the same type of space. As much as I have gained and grown from this friendships, it doesn’t mean that they will last forever. As my mother always said, “friends come and go, some of them are just designated  for a season.

Part of being an adult and truly loving yourself flaws and all, is realizing when to let go. Moving forward, dating for me will be put to the back burner as I focus my energy on other projects and adventures that I would love to venture on. This is not to say that I have given up but rather allow for the process to come naturally and let fate make its course.

Uber Chronicles on Love🚘🚙❤️💞🇿🇦

I have had my share of using uber in the past but never really got assimilated with it therally. But through my stay here in South Africa, it has become my main mode of transport. 
It can get a little pricey especially the more you commute into the city which would be Cape Town but in the long run its the best means of transport when it comes to safety, compared to using public transport. Furthermore, it is also cheaper than getting a cab🚖. 
Most uber drivers usually end up striking a conversation, Which personally has been quite interesting. Somehow I find that this is a great way to meet locals and get to know more about the culture and some hot spots to check out during your stay.🚨Besides, What better way of getting your best reviews from people who live and go to those places on a regular basis. 

So far, My experience has given me the opportunity to meet many local uber drivers who mostly happen to be originally from Zimbabwe. With each one having a story to tell, some tend to be heart breaking while for others,  it’s a case of a side hustle but all with the same goal. In search of a better life.

The topics of conversation usually range from weather to politics and sometimes can even get a little bit personal. On my way back from Cape Town earlier today, I got to meet Rudzani who was my uber driver. Originally from Limpopo a small town bordering Zimbabwe , Rudzani has lived in Cape Town for the past 13 years. He is married and a proud father of two children. For him uber driving is just a part time job to get extra spending money. 

From the get go, he welcomed me into his car with a warm big smile and to my surprise, a free cup of coffee☕️. I don’t know about you, but personally, anything that is free gets my full undivided attention. To my knowledge, not all ubers offer free drinks but I guess I just happened to be at the right place at the right time. Instantly I knew we were going to connect. 

It usually takes about 40 minutes ride to Cape Town from my residence on campus. So you already know we had ample time to converse. Normally, most of the conversations begin with the different cultural backgrounds and how I’ve found South Africa so far. After that, you never know where the conversation will lead to next. After a few minutes of awkward silence, Rudzani mentioned how every time he heads to stellenbosch, it reminds him of his ex girlfriend who happened to be white.  

I was somewhat taken back but it did spark curiosity on my end. I began to ask questions to get more insight. I asked him on his views about dating in this generation among many other things. But one thing that stood out was his views on interracial dating. 

According to Rudzani, it has never been about the skin color but more of cultural difference. Apparently most colored and white women from Cape Town are completely different from where he is from. Being an old school, traditional kind of guy, he believes in finding a woman who is cultured. Meaning aside from doing the “womanly duties,” one that can also work and contribute to the building of the family both emotionally and financially. 

Out of every one I have come across, most people who believe that the woman should stay home and bear children, do not believe in the woman working and vice versa. But for Rudzani he wanted both. 

In a sense I cannot help but somewhat agree. As much as we have evolved, I do think that somethings men do better compared to women as well as women do other things better than men. Most of those that women do better than men tend to fall into the category of “womanly duties”. Don’t get me wrong that men can’t do the same things as women and vise versa but I just feel that there’s a touch that gender roles do add that the opposite gender cannot attain. 

For example, a mothers love. Yes a single dad can raise a child on his own but without that feminine motherly touch, the child will always yearn and seek for it when they get older. I am aware of also the Daddy issues syndrome that most girls who have not had their fathers in their lives face. But looking at the bigger picture a mothers love/influence is way more important and levels higher. This is just my take on it. Not saying that I am right but my perspective. 

Share your comments and let me know what you think.