One thing I have learned is that the older you get, you tend to look for different things to inspire you and motivate you. You can call this part of adulting but at this stage of my life, I am always in search of things that are relatable or fall in line with where I am at currently. While reading self-help books, or biographies is the obvious go-to answer, podcasts are a good alternative. Also being the fact that podcasting is the new wave, I was very curious to check it out and give it a shot. I haven’t gotten a chance to listen to an audiobook yet but I am guessing it is the same experience. Continue reading “Podcasts📻🎙”
If there was a legit manual/school or even class on how to adult that one can get access to, please sign me up. I’ve heard it all. From my fellow co-workers, friends and even mentors. They say, “It never gets easier to figure it out, it only gets easier to cope and work your way through it“. Don’t be fooled by what you see online and on social media. People only want you to see what they want you to see. Most of us are struggling or just making the ‘struggle bus‘ look very cute.
We so are so used to a systematic environment from the day you start school but they don’t prepare you once your out of the system. By “they” I am reffering to the education system and institutes. Unless the system has been changed, those in my age group or older know exactly what I am talking about.
I have recently found my self going to seminars and little workshops that teach you certain things. Like financial advising, money, paying and shopping for health insurance among many others. lets just say adulting is really hard!
Not too long ago, I ran into my high school teacher and home-girl was calling and saying it like it is (love that about her). I remember after chatting about everybody who was in my year that she kept in touch with, I dared to ask her what she thought how my life would turn out. I will not embarass my self by telling yall her thoughts but long story short, she did not hold back. According to her, I was one of the few that somewhat surprised her. Knowing me, I’ve never been predictable but it did feel good to be viewed from a different perspective.
Experiences and conversations through this journey of adulthood have definitely taught me one thing. Never compare your self to those around you. Just like in a race, those who win never look at their competitors. Everybody has their own path. Remaining humble and trusting your own process, is truly a test of its own.
Looking back, 2018 will be a pivotal chapter in my life. In a way, it’s been a remarkable yet the hardest stage of my life. The good has been really great while the bad has been some of the worst fall. Being able to balance everything from responsibilities, expectations, social life/relationships and even that self-care that’s very essential, has been a task.
Now that I have hit a quater life century, it really hit me that one has to be able to prioritize and be realistic when it comes to following your dreams and facing reality. I guess you can’t have it all. Everything comes with a price whether you realize it or not. Yup, adulting is no joke.
For those who are in college and are really eager to finish and join adulthood, I emphasize to take your time and enjoy right now because that was once me. I would give anything to go back and maybe plan myself a little bit more and enjoy living under my parents roof. Not worrying about bills, loans or fulfilling the worlds expectations.
It’s been close to two years since I visited a vineyard and had a wine tasting session. Today, all the memories came rushing back from the mini adventures that I ventured in South Africa through my wine tasting escapades. Oh Stellenbosch how I miss you.
For those who’ve been with me from back in the day, I am sure you know what am talking about. If you haven’t, please do yourself a favour and go check out my archives and you’ll get all the way caught up.
I got a chance to visit Nashoba Valley Winery in Bolton Massachusetts with a group of special folks. Two of my co-workers who I adore to death and Esther who I met for the first time but had a lot of mutual friends. Esther if you’re reading this, I am still baffled why our so called “friends” never introduced us because the connection was too real.
This is my first official wine tasting experience in America and I must say, “What the hell have I been doing with my life?” Quick note to all my wine lovers. It doesn’t matter what location, city or country. The culture of wine tasting is literally all the same. As soon as we arrived, I felt right at home. Not to be extra and all dramatic but I did feel like the prodigal son that had finally returned home.
For just $15, we got to taste and sample 10 different wines out of at least 20 options based on one’s preference. Well technically, you get 10 tokens and you can use them to sample wine, beer or brandy. Of course I used all of mine to try the wines. Compared to Rands (SA currency🇿🇦), this is some bull pricing but for the average Americans, this is absolutely affordable. The atmosphere and the energy was absolutely amazing. From the open greenery fields to the actual vineyards, the views were absolutely stunning and very relaxing as well.
Towards the end, we bought a couple bottle of wines. Some to take home and the rest to sip while we ate and enjoyed the day and the views. What better way to soak it all in with some good vibes, friends and amazing outlooks.
The weather was perfect as well which added to the aesthetics of the property that contributed to a dope Instagram pic. As I am getting older, the clubbing scene/night life is kinda getting too outdated for me and I am finding myself leaning towards these kind of vibes and hobbies.
I absolutely recommend for everyone to check out Nashoba Valley Winery. It’s perfect for a date, mini day get away for couples, friends and even with family. Stay tuned because there’s definitely gonna be more post on my wine adventures.
They say that in photography there is a reality so subtle, that it becomes more real than reality. It’s definitely a different perspective when you look through the lens of a camera. I bet most of my fellow photographers can relate to what I mean. When taking a picture, there is one thing the photograph must contain, the humanity of the moment. We all view the world and its content through the lens of the human eye. A good photographer must attain that humanity of the moment with every picture through just the lens of a camera.
I got the opportunity to shoot my old time friend Whitney with the help of one of my closest friends Lucy. I met Whitney through a friend of a friend and it was an instant connection. Her soft spoken voice that filled the room with so much vibrance and personality which was easily recognizable. Oh and you can’t forget that touch of the ‘Lowell hood’ with a sprinkle of a southern belle which she expressed with every reference of “ooooh child” in every sentence of a story she told. She knows what I am talking about.
Whitney was the first person that I experienced the late night city lights of Boston. This was around the summer of 2012 and every other day we would drive my little hoopty hoopty, otherwise known as black cherry into Boston. We would immerse ourselves into the city’s diverse population and culture that we lacked back in our hometown. We shared our dreams and goals to each other as we made promises to our future self. This was about 5-6 years ago. After losing touch, life as you know it had a funny way of bringing us back together.
Whitney is now about 36weeks pregnant and had asked me to do a maternity shoot of her before she gave birth. Of course I had to bring in my partner in crime Lucy, who is my creative twin that we see eye to eye when it comes to the art of fashion. Lucy helped me execute this one of a kind master piece.
Lucy, who’s a Picasso when it comes to make up, helped with co-directing of the shoot and setting up of the scenes. Of course her energy and positive vibes added to the ambiance of the room.
What was only expected to be a just a favor for an old time friend, turned out to be the best baby shower gift I could give to her. Here is to you Whitney as you begin this new chapter of your life. I know you’re going to rock being the best mom in the world. Happy Mother’s day.
The journey to self-discovery has no end! It’s a continuous voyage that one can only learn along the way while being put to the test to what you have already learned. Life has not wasted any moment in putting me through different tests, where I have had to prove that I did learn from my past and can’t afford to make the same mistakes.
As human beings it’s natural to yearn and search for a soulmate whether for friendship or intimacy through a significant other. Personally I have been open to satisfying this urge and in the process, I have come across folks who are on the path to satisfy the same need. In other words I have joined the dating scene and it’s not as easy or fun as I hoped it would be. It’s actually been more exhausting.
I am quite a social person or so I would like to believe but who thought dating in this generation is a whole type of ball game. Being an old-school type of individual (meaning I’ve tried online dating, not into hook ups or friends with benefits), I feel like a different type of breed partaking in the world of dating among my peer group. If you don’t know what I am talking about, monogamous/committed relationships in my generation is quite hard to find. Personally I’ve always been open to dating, so I’ve had my share of online dates as well as “fun” but just recently, is when I became serious about it. Especially now that its summer and its a new chapter of my life, I thought I would give it a shot.
Funny how some people that I’ve met can really test your whole being (insecurities and all). I guess the point of this blog post is that there’s a very thin line to settling for less in order to fulfill the urge of finding a significant other. Whether it’s for intimacy or just friendship. Being always the single one among your friends can get pretty frustrating. Although I do know what I deserve, I would be lying if I said that through this process I’ve allowed to be disrespected to a certain extent where I did question my worthiness. Hence my self-discovery journey was put to the test.
Now that I’ve moved back home, I also thought I would reconnect old friendships as well as extend olive branches to friendships that had died. Being in a new found space doesn’t mean the other party is in the same type of space. As much as I have gained and grown from this friendships, it doesn’t mean that they will last forever. As my mother always said, “friends come and go, some of them are just designated for a season.”
Part of being an adult and truly loving yourself flaws and all, is realizing when to let go. Moving forward, dating for me will be put to the back burner as I focus my energy on other projects and adventures that I would love to venture on. This is not to say that I have given up but rather allow for the process to come naturally and let fate make its course.
It’s been a while since I have posted a blog but let’s just say your boy has been busy trying to adjust back to reality. All that traveling definitely got me used to living a certain type of lifestyle that I pray, I will one day get back to it.
It’s exactly 30 days till my graduation and the senioritis has been REAL!! 👨🏿🎓(The decreased motivation toward studies displayed by students who are nearing the end of their high school, college, and graduate school careers). Low-key, I have had senioritis since my freshman year of college. This is the one thing in my life that’s actually hitting me way before the finish line. Normally, I am one of those people that reality hits at the actual moment. Funny enough I haven’t truly expressed or told many folks about my graduation except close friends and family. Mainly because I have this thing of not really telling people about anything major happening in my life, until it’s actually happening. I may speak of it lightly but not make it serious enough. This is because I am afraid of jinxing it or getting ahead of myself. (I know I am paranoid like that).
This is such a big deal for me. I can’t even imagine that I am finally so close to the finish line to get my bachelors📜. I am not really a school person so you can only imagine the struggle. The only reason I’ve gotten this far is just because I know the importance of education and this is a ‘plan B’ for me because in my head, I know I want to follow my music and acting career. (Realistically what are my chances though?) For those of you who don’t know, I am a journalism student at Lyndon state college up in Vermont.
Now that I am about to finish this chapter of my life, I can’t help but question and wonder what to do with my life next. Actually in all honesty, I am frieking out and afraid. Like I know the whole routine where one is expected to get a job and jump into the workforce but I can’t help but strongly feel that that’s not my path. It also doesn’t help that I have been rejected in a couple of job entrees. I know I am meant to do something greater that’s even bigger than myself first, then adult later (Travel, Peacecorp/Americorps, follow my dreams….etc). Then again the question is where do I start, where do I take the first step and how do I know that whatever path I decide to take is the right path.
It’s funny how just three weeks ago I was literally working at drive through McDonald’s, not knowing I will be half way accross the world hiking and being surrounded by magnificent views.
Like everything is still so surreal to me that it somehow feels like a dream. Yesterday I got the opportunity to hike Mt Stellenbosch. Those who live, work or study in Stellenbosch know that all mountains dominate the town and are visible from almost anywhere.
If am not wrong ( still trying to figure out the geography), this is the same mountain that I get to see from my bedroom window which I posted in one of my last blogs. From the first day I saw it , I have daydreamed about being up there.
Anyways, yesterday after sleeping in most of the day, I decided that my unfit self should take on the challenge. At first it wasn’t the best idea but once I got half way to the top, it all became worth it.
Not to intimidate you, but the trails are not really safe and guided so it is encouraged to hike at your own risk. For those who have fallen under the spell of the new Pokémon game, I strongly suggest do not try to play while your hiking.
It took me about 4 hours to get to my desired point and back. That also included rest stops, sight seeing, snap chatting and most importantly photoshoot sessions.
Not sure if you can already tell by now that I am not really the adventurous type, so I wasn’t really aiming to get to the summit. But as you can see from the photos it was well worth it.
I bet your wondering how someone like me who’s a little on the heavier side did it. I mean, it was a bit of a struggle but don’t be fooled because I still got the African genes in me and they did come in handy.
I guess in a way being able to live in Vermont during school, I have had my share of hiking which was all along preparing me.
Am still kind of sore from the hike but definitely looking forward to hiking the next mountain. Hope fully this time I will make to the peak. 🌍🇿🇦⛰